givemeabreak's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Silver Dollar Pancakes The outfit: baggy cotton bland beige shorts, complete with elastic waistband. White t-shirt. No bra, No panties. Sound erotic? I thought not... It was my Puerto Rican Housegirl cleaning outfit du jour. I had bedhead, sweaty everything, furry teeth, and I am sure I was holy shit halitosis girl. That said... I could hear Casey barking like Cujo in the kitchen area, and fearing she would break through the glass sliding door, I stopped my in my lysol-induced fog and noticed two dogs in my yard. One was an older looking beagle, the other was a B-I-G dog that kinda looked like the dog from Turner and Hooch. I could see the big dog had a tag on his collar which might help me locate where he lived. So, I threw on my flip flops and grabbed Casey's leash. I sat down on my porch steps and the big dog came right up to me. I of course talked to her and found out her name was Sable Jean and that she conveniently lived about 3 blocks from me. In the name of saving animals, I head out into the streets to bring Petey the beagle and Sable Jean home. As we are walking it occurs to me that I am dressed like the Queen of my Doublewide and my boobs are banging together like two droopy fat hands clapping. Too late now, I am on a mission. Public personal humiliation is no object to me. I get to the house and of course nobody is home. My mind is racing as what I should do. I was not about to take the dogs to my house to have Casey go apeshit nuts, nor was I going to call Animal Control and have the dogs picked up. Even though I was irritated at the owners for having their dogs running free where they could be hit on the highway or worse, I didn't want them to have to pay a huge fine either. I just wanted the pooches to be home safe and sound. My next plan was to take the dogs to the park's office and ask one of the managers if they could call the phone number on the tag. Also, I wanted them to keep the dogs there until the owners got home. Good idea Dog Saving Girl! This now meant I was to walk from the complete back end of the trailer park to the front end of the trailer park. On the main street where everyone drives, past the mailboxes, past the playground area....God, the horror for those people. They are probably still in therapy. As I was strolling along, boobs a flailin' I had this unbelievable realization. Big Brown Nipples in a white t-shirt on a REALLY sunny day. Too late to change course now. I was a walking titty show. The people at the office graciously took the dogs and I made a run for the door. As I was dreading the long walk of shame back to Daisy Lane, Tracy pulls up in the car as she is heading home from work and just about busts a gut laughing at my incredibly pretty self and the story of the two pupperoni's. 11:25 a.m. - Thursday, Apr. 27, 2006 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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